Journalists in trouble

I though we had problems when I was a foreign correspondent but the difficulties some face now make those of the '60s, '70s and '80s seem pale. We dealt with death in Central America, imprisonment in Cuba, beatings in Mexico. Our communications were state-of-the-art but the art then was rudimentary in comparison.

Mexico, where we spent 15 years, has become a very dangerous place for journalists. Some parts have just flat become dangerous for everyone.

It was a rarity for journalist to be killed in those days although some were. Some of us were injured or traumatized covering coups, wars in Central America and some terrible natural disasters. Vietnam could be a dangerous place for reporters. But consider this:

In the past 15 years from 1992 through 2006 there have been 580 journalists killed around the world. Only a few cases have been fully investigated and in even fewer cases has there been punishment for those who murdered the journalists. And most of them have been murder. The typical slaying is at the journalist's home, or on a commute to work, or while at the desk. The Committee to Protect Journalists -- which didn't exist when I was a foreign correspondent -- reports that seven out of 10 were targeted in retaliation for their reporting and hunted down to be murdered. Even in war zones murder is the leading cause of death.

You can read CPJ's report, a country-by-country death toll, and other important facts about dangerous reporting at the CPJ home page, http://www.cpj.org/index.html.

Shiver me timbers...

We are definitely into winter here in Western North Carolina. No serious snow or ice but the thermometer fell to 18 degrees. And we are in the "moderate" isothermal belt where it is supposed to be warmer. The temperature got into the single digits in some parts of the state.

Winter is here, though.

The beautiful leaves of October are now almost all on the ground. One or two trees did not lose their leaves. The leaves turned brown but hang on to the tree anyway. This is what early winter looks like from our front porch.

I am thinking about going into the leaf business next fall. Set me up a "store" on E-Bay to sell leaves by the pound to those poor souls in the Southwest who don't get to rake. Genuine Smoky Mountain leaves! Never touched asphalt! Spread 'em on your lawn and driveway! Be the envy of your desert neighbors!

We're going through firewood rapidly but a warm fireplace and a cozy room are sure nice in the evening. The house is getting all spruced up for Christmas. All of our children and grandchildren will be with us starting Dec. 23. We'll have at least 15 people around the Christmas table. What a blessing for us!

Dr. Sean got things rolling by shipping a case of his favorite Oregon wines, all now tucked away safely in the wine rack. We have ordered a smoked turkey and a pork loin from a restaurant in Columbus. A turkey from the place was on our plate at a friend's house for thanksgiving and it was mighty tasty. That will save Sylvia some work in the kitchen. She suggested Chef Charles might want to cook for us but I think that would be a busman's holiday. Why should he take time off from his chefing career to chef for us? Maybe desserts?

On another note

Cuba celebrated Fidel Castro's birthday last week, while we were in Texas visiting my Mom, my sister and my brother-in-law (who had even fewer side effects from the radiation therapy than I did). The celebration that Castro did not attend because of his poor health reminded me of my trips to Cuba, our work with independent journalists in Cuba, and our Cuban-American friends.

Read this story about a poor guy who is only a journalist wanna-be but still got tossed into a Castro jail. The course mentioned in that story was a distance learning project I developed while I was still teaching. I get impatient with people who try to ignore the abuse of basic human rights in Cuba.

Bonnie Anderson is a journalist I have known since our days in Mexico City. Bonnie now runs a charter fishing deal in Puerto Rico. But read this moving piece she wrote about what Castro did to her. She used to be a big time exec with CNN but she got crosswise with management over the dumbing down of news.

Leaves and Vistas

This is the magnificent time of the year in Western North Carolina when the mountains and valleys combine to show off God's artistry in splendid color.

The views from the Blue Ridge Parkway are breathtaking and the view from the front porch ain't bad, either.

New Friends, New Places, Frozen Faces

We joined the Chariots of Light Carolina Tour on Tuesday and stayed with them until Thursday, when we had to return home. It was wonderful seeing some old friends and meeting new members of this Christian bikers club. The big news was announced at dinner on Tuesday night -- Bill and Ginger Horn, who had been running the East Coast Chapter, will become the national directors of Chariots. They will get to stay in North Carolina even though national headquarters have been at Jerry Savelle Ministries International in Texas. This picture shows Ginger and Bill flanking Dr. Savelle at a scenic overlook on the Blue Ridge Parkway in North Carolina. The temperature at the time was about 30 degrees.

Sylvia's sprained ankle kept us from riding the bike on the tour but we enjoyed the fellowship anyway. Here is Sylvia with Shelley Cochran of Miami. Shelley's husband, Pastor Chris Cochran, is on the right. They are good friends from Voice for Jesus Church in Miami. Chris is the chapter director there.

Fall and early winter are definitely here. We had sub-freezing temperatures on the tour and got home to lower 50s. The foliage is beautiful. It is such a treat to be able to simply look out the window and see all these beautiful colors.

Glorious Weather, Beautiful Views

We have moved into Fall full speed now. Beautiful sunny days, cool and crisp nights. The leaves are in their fall colors in the mountains. Our trees are half-and-half, prettier each morning.

However ... they do shed leaves and acorns. I felt well enough to undertake some yard work but as I told my sister Bettye -- it is hard to determine if I am still suffering from fatigue or if I am suffering from laziness. Probably the latter because I did the yard work without much trouble once I convinced myself to get started.

Sylvia fell while on a walk last Sunday and sprained her left ankle. She is on crutches. The x-rays showed it to be a soft tissue injury but often that is worse than a break. She will see the orthopedist for a follow-up Monday.

The word from Texas is that my brother-in-law Pete is still doing good with his radiation treatments. He has finished three weeks and is on the downhill side of the therapy now. His doctor says all signs are good.

I think that I will commandeer Sylvia's Mini Cooper on Sunday and take her and the car for a cruise on the Blue Ridge Parkway. It is really beautiful this time of year. The Chariots of Light Christian bikers' club starts is Carolina tour Sunday. We will join the group in Maggie Valley on Tuesday, go with them to Greenville, SC, and then return home Thursday. We will take the car instead of the bike because of Sylvia's ankle.

Hallelujah!

At 1:17 p.m. on Wednesday, Oct. 4, 2006, my radiation oncologist peered through his laryngoscope up my right nostril and down my throat to the vocal cords and said, ""It looks good. This looks good!"

Thirty-three days earlier I received the last of 28 radiation treatments on what this doctor and two others had diagnosed as squamous cell carcinoma on my right vocal cord. Radiation therapy came after three attempts to remove it surgically. Two doctors had tried but found the structure of my throat prevented them from removing it completely.

I have completely recovered my voice but -- alas -- I do not sing any better than I did before the therapy.

You can imagine the joy we felt when we got the "all clear" even though we had been expecting a good report. Statistically this kind of treatment is successful about 95 percent of the time. But we also believe God heals. I had the support not only of the prayers of my family but also the prayers of friends and strangers scattered in a dozen different countries. So we felt before driving up to Ann Arbor that the report would be good.

We had lunch after the exam and then started driving back to North Carolina. The great news spread quickly. Sylvia fielded cell phone calls all the way across the state of Ohio and into Kentucky. It was an amazing and humbling feeling as I heard those calls come in. So many people had been praying for me or thinking of me. Wayne Cochran, pastor of Voice for Jesus Church in Miami, told the congregation Wednesday night. They responded with shouts of joy and a standing ovation for God's healing love. Pastor Wayne was also able to tell the pastors affiliated with Voice for Jesus because they were in conference in Miami when we got the news. They, and their congregations, had been praying for us for months.

Friends and family I had not heard from in years called or messaged. It is truly a time of joy.

I still get tired pretty easily but each day I am stronger and more eager to get on with enjoying this wonderful life. The leaves are just about ready to turn in our part of North Carolina. Fall is always a spectacular time here. This fall will be especially beatiful.

Our prayers are with my brother-in-law Pete who has exactly the same diagnosis I had. He started his radiation therapy on Monday, Oct. 2.

Getting Well

Things are better every day. My voice is almost back to normal. Those who heard me a week ago marvel at how much stronger my voice sounds now.

I could not break a whisper until about Sept. 20 when I started to get a little bit of timber back into my voice in the mornings. By nightfall it was back to ony a whisper. Now it is strong almost all day.

The coughing still comes and goes and I cannot find any connection. Perhaps it is caused by alergies as one ENT suggested. I will be doing fine and suddenly get a throat tickle that leads to a cough that leads to harder coughing that leads to gut-wrenching coughing. It soon goes away and will not bother me again for hours -- sometimes 12 or 14 hours, sometimes just five or six.

But under any token I am feeling stronger each day. I have a followup with my radiation oncologist on Oct. 4. Can't wait to get the all-clear from him as further testimony to God's healing love.

Gaining Strength

I am getting stronger little by little. My voice is still very weak and my throat still hurst when I swallow. But the pain is less each day, and I feel stronger each day. Or almost each day. If I overdo the activity one day I am under the weather a bit the next day. So far I have ventured into Tryon for a haircut and to some friends' home in Hendersonville for dinner. The dinner trip really wore me out.

I still have coughing spells that start with a tickle in the throat, then progress into gut wrenching coughs. Medication helps but I use it only when absolutely necessary because I don't want too get addicted. It sure is good stuff, though.

Home again

As planned we started home Saturday morning Sept. 2 after a very nice breakfast with the kids and grandkids. We stopped for the night, again as planned, in Caryville, TN and went on home the next morning.

My thoat hurts and I can only speak in a whisper. My voice has no timber at all. I was able to drive about five hours on Saturday and all the way home, four hours, on Sunday.

It is really wonderful to be back hom in my very own bed.

ALL DONE!

The last treatment was at 4:45 p.m. today, Sept. 1. After it was over the ladies at the lab gave me diploma they had all signed. Very sweet of them. We start home tomorrow.
I am glad this is finally over but I will be even happier when the pain is gone, my voice is back and I have the "all-clear" from the doctors.

Two left

Awoke today with throat even very sore, even more so than in the past. Cannot speak above a whisper. It does not hurt any worse if I talk or don't talk but my voice has gone past the sexy bedroom sound down to a bare whisper. People have to really pay attention to understand me.

I gave the ladies in the therapy section two boxes of choclate truffles as a thank-you for taking such good care of me.

A treatment this afternoon, then pack up tomorrow, get the last zap, and head for home on Saturday.

Countin' Down!

Only three days -- inlcuding today -- to go before the treatment is over. My neck looks very sunburned. But the cream provided by the nurse helps a lot. I have almost no voice -- a very soft, very hushed bedroom whisper is about all I can muster. The doctor says the voice will return, although it may take a month or so.

He also said the sore throat will ease up in a few weeks. The sore throat has been one of the strongest side effects. It really hurts. The cough is less now because of the narcotic cough medication. That, and the "radiation mixture" cocktail I wrote about earlier ease the pain. But the narcotics also can cause constipation and great discomfort. Drinking lots of prune juice and plenty of water. Overall, the doctor says he is happy with my progress. I will return to Ann Arbor a month after we leave so he can check me, and then return again in three months.

So I have today's treatment, then Thursday and finally, finish up Friday afternoon. We plan on driving toward North Carolina Saturday. I am really looking forward to seeing Lake Adger!

Backers suspect political motive - Hendersonville Times-News

The police chief, who is from Peru originally, was in our fire training class in Columbus. We like him.
Backers suspect political motive - Hendersonville Times-News

Double dose

I had a double dose of radiation therapy today to make up for the day the machine was down last week. No problem -- except that of getting out of bed early enough to be at the hospital by 7 a.m. The second treatment was at the regular 4:45 p.m. slot.

Thank God!

We got the good news Thursday -- we can make up the missed day of radiation and keep to our plan to return home on Saturday, Sept. 2, rather than staying over for one more treatment on the Tuesday after Labor Day.
A bad motherboard in the radiation machinery caused a cancellation last Monday but we pleaded for a makeup. They will do it at 7:15 a.m. Monday, and then I will get that day's regular treatment at 4:45 p.m.

So only five more treatment days -- six actual treatments -- to go!

Some more examples of the blessings from all this:

We have heard from cousins I had lost contact with through my own negligence and their encouragement and love has been a great boost. Cousin Marty fought her own battle against breast cancer and won it with good humor and prayer. She wrote about her experimental treatment that had everyone in the hospital -- maybe even the cleaning lady -- checking out her breast. She also wrote that when she needed an answer she lay in her bed and said: "God, I need your help with this one! Turned over and went to sleep, woke up and got my answer in the evening newspaper. Helped me through a really tough time." The answer she saw in the paper was the Prayer of the Day, from Joshua 1:19.

"Be strong, and very courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go"

Marty wrote:
"I cut that little prayer out of the paper, and at this moment, it is taped securely in the middle of my monitor here on my desk. It's turned yellow, almost grey green and looks yucky. But I am one of the lucky ones who can see that my prayer is answered, literally, every day."

Cousin Doug wrote that he and his wife are praying for a quick recovery "And we will do that in spite of my intense envy over your taking up a wonderful life of retirement in a beautiful place." Doug followed me into a career with The Associated Press. Yet he is still speaking to me.

Why cable news pursues the JonBenet Ramsey case | csmonitor.com

Click on the title to see a good analysis of why the cable news programs pay so much attention to the JonBenet story. It all goes back to the OJ trial, when they got the feed from the courtroom free and CNN was able to fill hours of space at very little cost.

Bummer

A line in the book of Proverbs says that disappointment makes the heart sick. Yesterday, the radiation team called Chuck to tell him that the machine was broken. Therefore, he wouldn't have a session that day.

For an instant, we were bummed out.

We have been faithfully marking off the days on the calendar until the treatment is over. An extra day off must have been what Chuck needed. He had a long sound sleep.

His molecules got a needed boost.

After the primary session, I asked him how the treatment felt. He said, " I feel like my molecules are dancing. And it's a dance I don't know."

Today he will ask the doctor about the finish date because we don't want to stay over the Labor Day weekend for one session.

Mistaken Identity

In Oaxaca, two reporters were badly beaten. The crowd thought they were policemen.
Viernes 18 de Agosto de 2006 / Miembros de la APPO golpean a reporteros

Halfway There!

I had my 14th treatment on Tuesday -- only 14 more to go before this is over. My throat has been very sore since Sunday and the coughing has only become stronger. On Tuesday the doctor prescribed a potent narcotic cough syrup that seemed to work Tuesday night. I was also given a "radiation mixture" of Lidocaine, Benadryl and Malox to soothe and coat my throat at mealtimes and bedtime. It works pretty good but doesn't last very long. I took a shot last night and then had a hamburger and onion rings.

I was pretty miserable over the weekend and on Monday and Tuesday because my throat hurt so bad. It is just a dull ache until I swallow and then becomes the worst sore throat I have ever had. The doctor said this is to be expected and might get worse before it gets better as the radiation therapy continues. But it is still a "good" sign.

Sylvia and I have been together so long we thing alike. I stopped at the Soups restaurant and bought an extra-large container of cheese and broccoli soup. She had stopped at the grocery store earlier and bought the ingredients to make cheese and broccoli soup.

So we will be souped-up for a while.

We heard last night of the death of Joe Vidi, a long-time friend, brother in Christ and member of Voice for Jesus Church in Miami. He had a heart attack.

The Weekend!

More beautiful weather in Washtenaw County. My Friday treatment was uncomplicated. I hope this weekend respite --no more rays until Friday afternoon -- will give my throat a chance to cool off a bit.

The constant sore throat reminds me every time I swallow that I should have never picked up my grandfather's Camel cigarettes. But if the worst of this is just the discomfort of a sore throat I will really be blessed. My energy level is pretty good today but I can't swallow much but smoothies, oatmeal and soup. Warm tea is soothing, too.

We are thinking about heading into Ann Arbor to hang out downtown for a while. I think I feel up to it.

Ups and Downs

My therapy Thursday was again quick and easy. I saw a substitute doctor after the treatment -- my regular doctor is on vacation -- and described my sore throat and coughing symptoms. She said the sore throat was an expected result of the treatment, said nothing about the cough, and said the regular doctor will be back next week. She gave me a cream for the slight burning of the skin on my throat. So I will stay with the over-the-counter throat and cough medications I am taking until my doctor is back next Tuesday.

I spent a pretty rough night with the cough and raw throat. The throat only hurts when I swallow. It feels raw and some liquids and foods are harder to swallow than others. I had a couple of cups of weak coffee -- no cream or sugar -- and some watermelon for breakfast. That soothed the throat for a while. We slept with the windows closed and the AC on last night with the thought that I may be experiencing some allergy problems with the windows open. Over-the-counter allergy medication seems to help the runny nose and sneezing.

This is a beautiful Michigan summer morning - about 70 degrees and sunny. The forecast is for a low tonight in the 50s. The windows will be open for sure.

I reach the halfway mark -- treatment No. 14 -- next Tuesday.

Gain Through Pain

We had a wonderful day Wednesday. A good night's sleep Tuesday night made the difference for me. And a good day for me made the difference for Sylvia.

No coughing during the night. A solid eight hours of nocturnal bliss made for a very comfortable day Wednesday. It was topped by a very quick in-and-out treatment in less than 15 minutes. I was at the hospital a total of 22 minutes. That's the fast-pitch record so far. The session included two x-rays, a weekly procedure to make certain the bony structure has remained the same and no treatment adjustments are necessary. Apparently the bony structure changes with variations in weight.

The only draw back in an otherwise great day was the onset of a sore throat -- promised as one of the more certain side effects of throat radiation therapy. If started Wednesday evening and progressed during the night so that it is "hurtin' pritty good" this afternoon.

This is actually a good sign even if it is uncomfortable. The "acutely responding" normal tissues in my throat react to the radiation pretty much the same way the tumor cells respond. So if I have a sore throat that means something good is happening in there and tumor cells are getting killed -- No Pain, No Gain.

The pain has not gone beyond the "my throat is sore" phase. Some patients have reported pain so severe it limits the ability to swallow food.

While all this is going on I have kept up with the rest of the world, of course. There was a little flury of excitement when Fidel Castro turned over the Cuban government controls to his brother Raul. One of my favorite sites for news from within Cuba is www.cubanet.org. This site has stories from the independent (dissident) journalists as well as links to Cuba's official, controlled press. Where else could I learn that thieves robbed the farm of Antonio Alonso, a leader in the anti-government farmers organization, and left him only with the pants he wore?

And the big news today -- the arrest of the terrorists in London and the increased airport security -- make me very glad I no longer fly around for a living.

And finally a bit of South Florida news:

Eugene Salvage, the police chief at Fort Pierce, has been arrested for forging his ex-wife's name on a $5,800 check. His ex-wife is Gwendolyn Boyd, police chief in North Miami. She's the one who did away with the swimming requirement for police officers in order to make it easier to recruit Haitian-American officers.

Weekend Recovery

Today, Aug. 8, 2006, is our wedding anniversary. Sylvia and I were married 47 years ago today in Denton, Texas. I can only barely remember not being married. She is such a part of me now that I cannot begin to imagine what life would have been like without her.

It is good that there are no therapy sessions on Saturday or Sunday. That gives me a chance for some R&R and on Monday -- yesterday-- I felt rested enough to make a pilgrimage. Sylvia and I drove down to Cabela's super outdoors store south of Ann Arbor. I had purchased some rod holders for our pontoon boat on our last trip up here but the brackets were the wrong size so they had to be exchanged.

It was good I was rested. It really hard to get in and out of Cabela's in less than half a day. The place is huge -- full or fishing stuff you never know you need until you see it, and stuff you didn't know existed.

I got the exchange done. I bought Sylvia a sweater and a jacket. She picked them out, then hesitated until I insisted I wanted her to have them. I am happy that I am financially and physically able to buy stuff for her. We had a burger at the Longhorn steak house nearby, then bought gift candy at a candy outlet store. Factory second chocolates.

The Monday afternoon treatment was quick and smooth. But Monday night I began to develop a sore throat and the cough was back in force. Kept me awake a lot Monday night. I will see the doctor Tuesday afternoon and see what he recommends. The cough kept me awake a lot and disturbed Sylvia's sleep, too.

Twenty to go

I have now completed eight radiation treatments and have only 20 more to go. The third week of treatment starts tomorrow. The Friday session was a good one, in and out very quickly.

I felt very good Friday and Friday evening. We had dinner and a movie at Cathy's house. But Saturday was a very sluggish day. I felt as if I was walking through molasses until about 3 p.m., when the world got rosier. Some trouble sleeping nights -- very unusual for me -- and that must contribute to the fatigue.

So far I could have remained in Mill Spring and driven to Asheville or Spartanburg for the therapy without any problem. But our presence here has been a great relief for our kids and for Sylvia. For me, too. It is wonderful having such a support group of loving family members around me. They put up with my moods without complaint. Or at least without complaining to me.

I am sure glad I didn't make them hate me when they were growing up.

I have been asked for some reference links for others preparing for radiation therapy on the neck. I posted a couple earlier so here goes:

http://www.medicinenet.com/radiation_therapy/article.htm

http://www.cancerbackup.org.uk/Cancertype/Larynx


http://www.med.umich.edu/radonc/index.htm

http://www.rdoc.org.uk/patientthroat.html

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/radiation-therapy/CA00031

I will post more links as I find them.

What's it like?

Sylvia asked me what I think about during the radiation therapy. I think about how tight the mask is. But mostly I pray in the Holy Spirit and praise God.

It is God who gives men the intelligence to invent the kind of machinery we are using.

It is God who put this kind of work in the hearts of my doctor, his nurse and the technicians.

It is God who is guiding the hands of those who treat me.

It is God who is consoling those I love.

The technicians -- all are female -- are very considerate. My appointment is for 4:45 p.m. Monday thorough Friday but they tipped me that if I get there a little early they can probably get me in early. Once they had to come out to advise me they were running behind but usually the system works pretty good. The receptionist reads a bar code on my hospital card, which tells the computer I am there. Within few minutes I am called into the treatment room.

Some days are faster than others. Yesterday I was in and out of the place in less than 15 minutes!

The treatment leaves me kinda groggy and a little disoriented but so far that has passed in a short time. I think I feel that way because of the mask, not because of the radiation. My skin feels warm where the radiation enters but that is not uncomfortable. The doctor says that as the treatment progresses I might develop what looks like a sunburn on my neck at about the level of my Adams apple. Some patients also develop severe fatigue. I reject that.

My days have settled into a routine of sorts, built of course around the afternoon appointment. Sylvia and I have our prayer time together first thing in the morning. I want to walk but the heat has been so severe these past few days that we only walked on two mornings. After breakfast I try to get in some writing. I am working on a novel about Barrabas.

I may run an errand or two or just relax and read o watch a movie in the afternoon. About 4:15 I head for the hospital.

So far I have felt only minor fatigue but I still have a persistent cough -- one of the symptoms. Some times it feels like I am coughing up my toes.

I have a calendar with the treatments number, starting with 28 and going down to 1. Each evening I cross off another treatment.

The REAL First Session

Today was the real deal. My first radiation treatment for the squamous cell carcinoma on my right vocal cord -- throat cancer most likely caused by at least three decades of smoking. I quit on March 16, 2000 which is good because it would really be tough to quit while this is going on.

My advice to all smokers who read this: Quit now. This minute. If not for yourself then for those who love you. I am getting wonderful support from Sylvia and from my children and grandchildren but I really feel ashamed when I think about what my folly is putting them through.

The first session took about 45 minutes. There was some trouble adjusting the mask. The mask is plastic mesh that was molded to my face and head. It is fastened to the back board to keep my head immobile during the treatment. I am on my back. My shoulders have to be lowered so they will be out of range. So I have a platform under my feet with ropes around my wrists. When I push down with my legs it pulls my shoulders down out of the way.

The treatment itself is quick. I counted to 30 on one side and 40 on the other. But I am told they don't go by seconds but rather by doses of radiation.

I felt a little disoriented after the treatment but that went away in about 30 minutes. Cathy and Marty met us at the hospital, in a pouring rain, to take us to an Italian restaurant for dinner.

First Session

I had my first session in the Radiation Oncology department of St. Joseph's Mercy Hospital in Ann Arbor Tuesday. But I didn't get zapped.

The first session was dedicated to putting me in the proper position, putting on the newly minted mask and bolting it down to the table, and taking scans, x-rays and other pictures. This was done so they will have a baseline reference if there are any physical changes during the treatment.

I met with the doctor after the session. He said he had prescribed 28 treatments. They are done five days a week, Monday through Friday. So that means the last one would be on Sept. 1.


We have settled into the vacation house after a weekend with Pastor Wayne Cochran. Wayne and his son, Pastor Chris Cochran, were in Michigan for a series of teachings at several churches affiliated with Voice for Jesus church in Miami. That is the church where Sylvia and I were pastors -- and members for 20 years. We met up with them at Pastor Wayne's invitation in Owosso. He was preaching at Pastor Rick Story's church in nearby Corunna. It was wonderful to see them again and the entire congregation at Pastor Rick's church prayed for me Sunday.

On the Road Again

That's us -- on the road again and back in Mill Spring. We will return to Ann Arbor on July 21. I had the "simulation" for the radiation therapy before we left Ann Arbor and they set the date for my first treatment: Tuesday July 25. They made a mask I will wear at each session to align my throat at the same spot every time.

We will spend these days getting ready to be away from the lovely lake and the beautiful mountains. Our plan is to drive to Ann Arbor and stay in the home being loaned us by a wonderful couple from St. Luke's church in Ann Arbor http://www.stlukeaa.org/.

Sylvia and I responded to a couple of alarms for the Mill Spring Volunteer Fire Department this week -- giving me a chance to use the emergency lights installed on my Freestyle while we were in Ann Arbor. They worked great!

Bag it -- or Floating Through the World Cup

Son Sean has joined us for a few days, leaving his Portland practice in other hands. It is great having him here. His wisdom and advice are much appreciated.

The attempted surgery was five days ago, just before the 4th of July weekend. My throat felt fine because nothing had been cut or scraped. But I had a reaction to the anesthetic that was most unpleasant: urinary retention.

By midnight the day of the surgery I was a hurtin' pup. So Cathy and her husband Martin hauled me off to the emergency room of St. Joseph's Mercy Hospital, where a catheter was inserted and a bag strapped to my thigh. There was great relief! Friday morning Tim and I visited a urologist who said I should keep the catheter and the bag until Monday. I was able to find some humor in all this. And it made it much easier to watch the World Cup without missing any action caused by bathroom breaks. Sean went to the urologist with me on Monday. I got rid of the bag but had to insert a catheter myself thrice daily until my bladder returned to normal.

Meanwhile, son Tim Green had made an appointment for me with Dr. George Henning, a radiation oncologist at St. Joseph's. We all trooped over to the hospital from Cathy's house on July 6 for a preliminary visit with the oncologist. After much internal debate and family discussion I decided to have the radiation therapy in Ann Arbor rather than in North Carolina. If we have this done while at home in Mill Spring it will mean an hour drive each way for Sylvia. It will also mean she will be without the support of our great kids. The therapy will begin July 24 and will be concluded around Labor Day. That's a long spell to be away from home.

We arranged to rent a furnished apartment in Ann Arbor but Cathy had notified the people at St. Luke's Lutheran Church of our situation. A wonderful couple loaned us the use of their home -- they are out of the country until Labor Day -- so we can avoid the expense of renting the furnished apartment. The leasing agent at the apartment complex graciously agreed to cancel our agreement.

Deeply Disappointed

The surgery to remove the cancer on my right vocal cord happened on June 29 -- but it didn't happen, too.

I was put under -- a difficult task for me and for the anesthesiologist. See why at http://www.asahq.org/publicationsAndServices/Difficult%20Airway.pdf.

The anesthesiologist wanted to prepare me for an "awake intubation" which is much more difficult for the patient and the doctor than for an intubation while asleep. The danger was that if they put me to sleep and could not intubate they might not be able to wake me up. So we did this before entering the surgical suite:

1. A nasal spray to deaden that airway.

2. Gargle and swallow increasingly thicker doses of Lidocaine. This is a local anesthetic. The purpose was to deaden the tongue, throat, mouth and all that makes up the airway. This would allow the intubation with relatively less discomfort.

3. Pray that all would work. Pastor Rick Story, a pastor affiliated with Voice for Jesus Church, was at the bedside as I gargled. So were Sylvia and Cathy.

4. After another examination in surgery the aneshesiologist decided to try a regular intubation. "We can breathe for you, I am certain," he said.

So all that nasty Lidocaine was not necessary, after all.

I went to sleep hearing the surgeon and the anesthesiologist discussing what they would do. I woke up alone in the recovery room. Sylvia and Cathy were quickly summoned. I was okay. I had survived. But I could see in their eyes that something was amiss.

It was Cathy who told me. Sylvia said later she would not have been able to hold back the tears.

The surgery was not successful.

Dr. Hogikyan had not been able to reach all of the tumor, either. So he decided to remove none of it rather than just get a piece. The disappointment was like a blow to the stomach. But upon reflection I felt confident that God's hand was still in this and I am just along for the ride. He has the controls.

My main reactions were anger and shame. Anger at myself for thinking I was bullet-proof and that all those warnings against smoking were meant for other people, not for me. Shame because of what I was putting Sylvia, the kids and all those who love me through. It took some serious prayer before I could forgive myself een though Sylvia had already said I was forgiven.

I will have to have radiation therapy. And I will praise God that this was caught early enough!

We'll try again

My examination at the UM Medical Center today was good. Dr. Norman Hogikyan was very thorough and used the latest technology for the exam. Sylvia, Cathy and our son Tim were with me. The doctor said that the UM pathologists agreed that the tissue samples from the second surgery showed squamous cell carcinoma "in situ." He showed us the cancer on a big screen TV. During the exam Sylvia and the kids could see the vocal cords "live" but I didn't see them until he called the film up on his computer.

Dr. Hogikyan feels confident he can remove the cancer with laser surgery and get enough margin around it to remove it completely. So we scheduled the third surgery for June 29. The preparatory exams are scheduled for June 27 although we were able to do some of them today.
I shared the anesthesiologist's letter with him.

Sylvia and I will return to Mill Spring for a few days, then return to Ann Arbor on June 26. Cathy has worked her magic to get me an appointment with the cataract specialist at the Kellogg Eye Center the morning of June 27 to see if my cataracts are ready for removal. I will finish up the pre-surgical exam that afternoon.

God has put me in the hands of a very experienced surgeon who definitely knows his business. I look forward to getting this surgery to be rid of the tumor and to avoid the radiation therapy. I thought the radiation would be done over a three or four day period and that would be it. But the reality is it would take at least six weeks of daily doses. Another out-patient surgery is much better than going through that.

We'll look again

We have decided to get a second opinion. It just doesn't seem plausible that modern medicine does not have instruments that can get down my throat far enough to remove this thing. Pathology has determined it is laryngeal cancer, a squamous cell carcinoma "in situ" on the right vocal cord. It is in the cells of the lining of the vocal cord and has not penetrated or spread.

The anesthesiologist had difficulty getting an airway inserted during the surgery -- so much so that he wrote a letter for me to use in any future surgery to alert those anesthesiologists. The pathway was so narrow and curved they had a real problem getting a ventilation tube inserted.
The recovery period from this second surgery was a lot longer than from the first. My throat healed fairly quickly but they had knocked my throat and mouth around a good bit so that I had some really sore spots. It took almost two weeks to get my strength back from the anesthesia.

Through the good work of our daughter, Cathy Huebner, I am hooked up with Dr. Norman Hogikyan of the University of Michigan Neck and Head Cancer center. http://www.cancer.med.umich.edu/cancertreat/headandneck/the_clinic.shtml

Dr. Hogikyan has had a lot of experience removing this kind of cancer. I have an appointment with him on June 6.

Everything I have read and everything the doctors have told me points to tobacco as the most likely cause of this problem. I smoked cigarettes, cigars and pipes for at least 30 years before I quit permanently on March 16, 2000.

I go to Ann Arbor confident in God's love and in the skills of the folks at the UM hospital. Cathy works in the university's Kellog Eye Center and I know the quality of doctors and staff there. I am sure those at the Cancer Clinic will be good, too.

A New Experience

On March 29 I had throat surgery to remove a sqaumous cell carcinoma on my right vocal cord. This out-patient surgery was the second to remove what the medicos originally thought was a polyp or callous-like growth often called teacher's or preacher's or singer's throat. The first surgery in August, 2005 was called successful and the pathology report looked okay. But the hoarseness returned. The polyp had returned. The doctor had warned that this often happened and that the type of polyp I had often turned into cancer.

The doctor was unable to remove it completely during this second surgery because a quirk in my anatomy made it impossible for him to get his instruments deep enough. The doctor recommended radiation therapy as the next step. That sounds very scary. Everyone had said this would be such a simple thing to get rid of and now we're talking radiation.

Sylvia and I have decided to get a second opinion, probably at the University of Michigan Medical Center in Ann Arbor. Meanwhile, my spirits are high. I know I am in God's hands and that He loves me. No matter how this develops I truly believe that God can bring good from it if I just keep focused on Him.